"If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him." James 1:5 NIV
One of my favorite amusements as as a child at our school playground was the old teeter totter. I found it fun to jump onboard with a fellow classmate who would join me for an afternoon ride. Balancing the teeter totter was always a challenge to achieve. I remember feeling a dizzy sensation as the board would constantly go up and down. Many adoptees express the feeling of being on a teeter totter, a tight rope or a roller coaster when they wrestle with the complexity of having two sets of parents: the birth parents who bore them and the adoptive parents who raised them. Some sense a dual identity and daydream about their unknown birth parents. They ponder which characteristics they may have inherited and which characteristics were learned. Adoptees often want to know if their birth parents ever think of them or miss them. They wonder who they look like, or whether they should search for their missing birth relatives. When questions or feelings about their birth parents or adoption surface they may be hesitant to speak with their adoptive parents for fear of being disloyal or "rocking the boat", teetoring their security. Those who are adopted may refrain from sharing their inner thoughts about their birth family that they feel might hurt their adoptive parents feelings. They may feel like they are walking a tight rope in regards to their loyalties. Adoptees may sense an intuitive need to honor both sets of parents for their unique place in their lives. So what should they do with their questions and the emotional rollercoaster they feel they are on?
The bible tells us in the book of James that God welcomes our prayers to him in seeking his wisdom in all things, especially complex matters of the heart. He gives generously and will not be judgemental towards us if we ask him. God understands the heart of an adoptee and all the relational issues that may cause questions, confusion or unrest. And our heavenly Father longs to share his infinite wisdom and counsel, just for the asking. We can be confident that He will help us balance the teeter totters, tight ropes and rollercoasters of our emotions.
Prayer: Heavenly Father, Wonderful Counselor, Thank you for reminding us to come confidently to your precious throne of grace where you welcome us. You are all knowing and all seeing and you alone understand our every need. You promise to listen to our questions and confusing thoughts. Even before a question is on our tongue, you have an answer for it. Prompt us to rely on your wisdom and strength as we walk this life long adoption journey. In Jesus precious name we pray, Amen.






